{"id":10280,"date":"2017-10-24T07:01:26","date_gmt":"2017-10-24T07:01:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/?p=10280"},"modified":"2017-10-27T07:03:29","modified_gmt":"2017-10-27T07:03:29","slug":"the-best-way-to-deal-with-failure","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/the-best-way-to-deal-with-failure\/","title":{"rendered":"The best way to deal with failure"},"content":{"rendered":"

Selin Malkoc<\/a>, The Ohio State University<\/a><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Failure is a part of life, and we make mistakes pretty much every day. How do we cope? Or better yet, how should we cope? <\/p>\n

Academics<\/a> and the mainstream media<\/a> tend to offer a simple solution: Don\u2019t let it get to you and think about how things could have been worse. <\/p>\n

These self-protective thoughts usually make you feel better. You move on.<\/p>\n

But is it possible that popular wisdom is missing a bit of the puzzle? Does setting aside the negative emotions make you any less likely to repeat the mistake? Noelle Nelson<\/a>, Baba Shiv<\/a> and I decided to explore possible upsides of feeling bad about failure.<\/p>\n

Feeling the pain<\/h2>\n

Even though they\u2019re unpleasant, we feel negative emotions for a reason: They likely played an important role<\/a> in human evolution and survival.<\/p>\n

Negative emotions tell us to pay attention, signaling that something\u2019s wrong \u2013 with our body, with our environment, with our relationships. <\/p>\n

So if you avoid negative emotions, you also might be avoiding the thing that needs your attention. Could deciding to focus on the negative emotions associated with failure lead to thoughts about self-improvement \u2013 and, with time, actual improvement? <\/p>\n

We designed a series of experiments to test this question. <\/p>\n

In the studies<\/a>, we used something called a two-stage paradigm: First participants attempted a task in which they failed; then \u2013 after series of unrelated tasks \u2013 they would have the opportunity to redeem themselves. <\/p>\n

In one, we asked our participants to search the internet for the lowest price for a particular blender brand and model (with the possibility of winning a cash price if they were successful). In reality, the task was rigged. At the end, the participants were simply told that the lowest price was US$3.27 less than what they had found. We then asked half the participants to focus on their emotional response to having failed, while the other half were instructed to focus on their thoughts about how they did. Then we asked them to reflect, in writing, on how they felt. <\/p>\n

After a few unrelated tasks, we gave the participants a chance to redeem themselves. In this seemingly unrelated task, we told participants to imagine that they were going to the birthday of a friend who wanted a book as a gift. We also told them that the book they find should be a bargain.<\/p>\n

We found that participants who were previously instructed to focus on the negative emotions following their failure in the blender task spent nearly 25 percent more time searching for a low-priced book than those who had been instructed to focus on their thoughts. <\/p>\n

When we examined the written responses, we also found some important differences.<\/p>\n

Those who had focused on their failure \u2013 rather than dwelling on how they felt \u2013 tended to have defensive responses: \u201cI didn\u2019t care much about this anyway\u201d; \u201cIt would have been impossible to find that price.\u201d <\/p>\n

In contrast, the participants who had spent time parsing their emotions produced thoughts oriented toward self-improvement: \u201cIf I\u2019d only searched longer, I would have found that price\u201d; \u201cI gave up too quickly.\u201d<\/p>\n

Not all mistakes are the same<\/h2>\n

It appears that focusing on the emotions of failure can trigger different thoughts and behaviors. Perhaps when you reflect on how bad you feel after failing, it motivates you to avoid experiencing that feeling again.<\/p>\n

But could this improvement migrate into other endeavors \u2013 for tasks unrelated to the original?<\/p>\n

\n \"\"
\n Buffalo Bills kicker Scott Norwood walks off the field after missing what would have been the game-winning field goal against the New York Giants in Super Bowl XXV.<\/span>
\n Chris O’Meara\/AP Photo<\/a><\/span>
\n <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To test this question, we added a variation of the second gift scenario. Instead of telling the participants to find an affordable book (which involved a price search like the original task), we asked them to find a book that they thought their friend would like. In this case, it didn\u2019t matter whether participants had focused on their emotions or thoughts after the first task; they spent similar times searching for the best gift. It seems as though the improvement only happens if the second task is somewhat similar to the original, failed one.<\/p>\n

While \u201cfeeling your failure\u201d can be a good thing, it doesn\u2019t change the fact that this can hurt. There\u2019s a reason people tend to instinctively rationalize or have self-protective thoughts after they\u2019ve made a mistake. <\/p>\n

It would be debilitating if you were to focus on how bad you felt after each failure, big and small. So it\u2019s up to you to decide which failures to try to improve upon, and which failures to shield yourself from. Clearly, one-off events or inconsequential mistakes \u2013 taking the wrong turn in a foreign city or being late to a party with friends \u2013 don\u2019t make the best candidates (hence the saying \u201cdon\u2019t sweat the small stuff\u201d). <\/p>\n

\"TheBut if you\u2019ve failed at something that you know you\u2019re going to have to confront in the future \u2013 say, a task for a new role at work \u2013 pause and feel the pain. Use it to fuel improvement. If you focus on how bad you feel, you\u2019ll probably work harder to ensure you don\u2019t make a same mistake again.<\/p>\n

Selin Malkoc<\/a>, Associate Professor of Marketing, The Ohio State University<\/a><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

This article was originally published on The Conversation<\/a>. Read the original article<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Selin Malkoc, The Ohio State University Failure is a part of life, and we make mistakes pretty much every day. How do we cope? Or better yet, how should we cope? Academics and the mainstream media tend to offer a simple solution: Don\u2019t let it get to you and think about how things could have […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":44,"featured_media":10281,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[36],"tags":[730,1633,3374,3375,228,209],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10280"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/44"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10280"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10280\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10282,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10280\/revisions\/10282"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/10281"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10280"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10280"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10280"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}