{"id":20388,"date":"2020-04-19T06:42:11","date_gmt":"2020-04-19T06:42:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/?p=20388"},"modified":"2020-04-19T06:42:11","modified_gmt":"2020-04-19T06:42:11","slug":"try-these-8-tips-to-reduce-parenting-stress-during-the-coronavirus-pandemic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/try-these-8-tips-to-reduce-parenting-stress-during-the-coronavirus-pandemic\/","title":{"rendered":"Try these 8 tips to reduce parenting stress during the coronavirus pandemic"},"content":{"rendered":"

Leslie E. Roos<\/a>, University of Manitoba<\/a><\/em> and Jessica Flannery<\/a>, University of Oregon<\/a><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Parenting can be tough at the best of times, but family life has changed dramatically during social isolation that\u2019s been mandated by COVID-19. The good news is that children thrive in an incredible variety of settings. Emerging evidence suggests that a little stress, particular in the context of a supportive parent-child relationship, can actually be beneficial because it builds resilience when taking on future challenges<\/a>.<\/p>\n

As clinical psychology scholars, our research<\/a> looks at how parent-child relationships can promote healthy development, particularly in the context of stress. <\/p>\n

Here are a few research-based strategies to make this unprecedented time more enjoyable. <\/p>\n

1. Notice what\u2019s going well<\/h2>\n

Living in close quarters, it\u2019s easy to pay attention to all the things going wrong, which can make children more resistant to helping out. Praising your kids and letting them know you appreciate their effort pays overtime by promoting more positive behaviour and enriching your relationships<\/a>. <\/p>\n

You have permission to praise anything that you want to see more of. \u201cThanks for saying please when you asked for (your third) snack,\u201d or \u201cNice job sitting so calmly!\u201d<\/p>\n

2. Plan (a little)<\/h2>\n

Children benefit from being able to predict small things and having some control. If you\u2019re into making a daily schedule \u2014 great \u2014 but it might work just as well to chat about choices for upcoming activities a couple times each day. <\/p>\n

If a task needs to happen, like schoolwork or cleaning, try sandwiching it between child-chosen activities. Research suggest that child choices can increase pro-social behaviour<\/a>. Look for patterns and use that to your advantage by setting up extra incentives to prevent problems.<\/p>\n

3. Get down to their level<\/h2>\n

Getting in multiple chunks of high-quality playtime<\/a> throughout the day can help kids manage their emotions and behaviour, build cognitive skills and support parent-child bonds. <\/p>\n

It\u2019s easier to participate when you are sitting on the floor and can give play your full attention. If you\u2019re having a hard time being distracted, try being over-the-top with silly voices, jumping jacks or getting messy. Imaginative play can be a welcome escape for adults too.<\/p>\n

4. Give good directions<\/h2>\n

When you need something done, it\u2019s wonderful to only ask once. Increase the likelihood of this by giving good directions: get close to your kids and make eye contact first. Ask them to do a specific, time-limited task, with no more than two or three steps, depending on child ability. \u201cI need to you put away this game then come to dinner.\u201d Wait there and count to 20 to make sure you receive a response. If not, try \u201cDylan, can I get an OK to cleaning up the game? It\u2019s dinner time.\u201d <\/p>\n

Make sure the demand is realistic given their mood and energy. Using a \u201cwhen-then\u201d statement can be a powerful way to maintain control. \u201cDylan, when<\/em> you clean up the game then<\/em> you can choose an ice cream for dessert.\u201d If that sounds too much like a sugary bribe, offer a family movie or playing with Super Soakers.<\/p>\n

\n \"\"
\n Adding water or fresh air is a good solution to many stressful situations with kids.<\/span>
\n (Shutterstock)<\/span><\/span>
\n <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

5. Take a step back<\/h2>\n

Pay attention to what your body feels like or your thoughts sound like right before you react. If you can step away from an escalating situation, chances are you\u2019ll have a more pleasant day. <\/p>\n

Identify what you might do to take a break \u2014 hand off parenting to a partner if possible, splash cold water on your face or take in a breath of fresh air. Even five deep breaths and reminding yourself about your love for your kiddo<\/a> can provide the space you need to tackle the situation with a clear(er) mind. <\/p>\n

6. Choose not to react (when you can)<\/h2>\n

Sometimes planned ignoring<\/a> of a minor challenging behaviour is the most effective way to move through the day. Another option is to describe what you\u2019re seeing and offer some choices. <\/p>\n

\u201cWow, you have a lot of energy and just kicked the door.\u2026 Can you show me your 20 best clucking chicken moves?\u201d Saying the unexpected can move kids into playful compliance. <\/p>\n

If exhaustion is making this hard, try a grandparent-approved adage: \u201cAdd water or fresh air.\u201d This can include ice cubes, baths, coloured water, a walk around the block or even spotting birds or dog poop piles from an open window. <\/p>\n

7. Reset and move on (when you can\u2019t)<\/h2>\n

Unpleasant outbursts or harsh words can happen to everyone. It\u2019s sometimes helpful for parents to offer a brief apology and gently move into new activities. <\/p>\n

It\u2019s equally important not to force an apology from your child, which can have the unintended consequence of making things worse. When you\u2019re in this \u201cresetting\u201d mode, try think back on the points above \u2014 getting down to their level, being goofy or noticing small positives will make it easier to move on with your day. <\/p>\n

8. Be generous with affection<\/h2>\n

Across species, physical comfort is a powerful way to manage stressful events<\/a>. As much as your sheer quantity of family time might not make extra squeezes or hand-holding automatically appealing, that\u2019s often exactly what kids need to manage big emotions that are simmering under the surface. <\/p>\n

We hope this list provides some assurance that you can offer your kids exactly what they need to feel loved, safe, and supported. If you\u2019re reading this, chances are that you\u2019re already providing just that. <\/p>\n

\n \"\"
\n Try these tips to help reduce pandemic parenting stress.<\/span>
\n Author provided<\/span><\/span>
\n <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

If you\u2019d like to share your experiences during the pandemic, we are researching how parents of children 0\u20138 years old are managing and what else they need at ParentingDuringThePandemic.com<\/a>. Our ultimate goal is to develop resources for our communities to better meet family needs.<\/em>\"The<\/p>\n

Leslie E. Roos<\/a>, Assistant Professor, Department of Psychology, University of Manitoba<\/a><\/em> and Jessica Flannery<\/a>, Doctoral Candidate in Clinical Psychology, University of Oregon<\/a><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

This article is republished from The Conversation<\/a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Leslie E. Roos, University of Manitoba and Jessica Flannery, University of Oregon Parenting can be tough at the best of times, but family life has changed dramatically during social isolation that\u2019s been mandated by COVID-19. The good news is that children thrive in an incredible variety of settings. Emerging evidence suggests that a little stress, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":44,"featured_media":20389,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[292],"tags":[1977,7559,7689,7958,1034,7956,7957],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20388"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/44"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20388"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20388\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20390,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20388\/revisions\/20390"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20389"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20388"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20388"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lifeandnews.com\/articles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20388"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}